A Theif, God’s Grace, Discipline, Wisdom and Mercy in Parenting.
One of the things that I’m always desirous of is that believers share with one another more openly and transparently. I believe this is one of the only ways that we get to know one another, peeling back the layers and seeing the depths of our own sinfulness. I thought I would in some small way on the blog this evening attempt to practice what I preach. Forgive the many themed blog post, it’s normally not a good thing to blog so late, but I’ll give it an evening try.
Today I received a call from my wife just before I got off of work. I was told that one of my children had stolen a piece of candy from the principle’s office. Yes that’s right not money, not a pen, but candy. The office had the lights shut off and she had walked out of the office when no one was present shoving her hands in her pocket, hiding the loot deep in her pockets until questioned by an office worker who caught her on her way out.
I’ll not user her name here for reasons of anonymity and well to protect their hearts just in case. As I heeded the advice from my wife on the phone to cool off, and hung up, I prayed to the Lord and asked him why? So many things rushed through my head from a harsh spanking to letting my kido have it, and as I breathed and calmed down I reflected quietly. This in someway was a reflection of my parenting. I had to take responsibility to some degree. I also knew that God’s word says as so often mis-quoted “If you spare the rod you hate your child.”
Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him
Proverb 23:13-14 Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die.If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol.
The bible says also, quoting this verse from the NASB:
Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.
More than anything I do not want to lose my daughter’s heart nor do I want her to lose heart. So somewhere in the center piece here is the discipline, in the love of Christ.
So as I’m pondering this as I’m leaving work this afternoon, I asked another believer who’s walking out with me to pray for me as I go home to deal with my daughter. I must say I am selfishly dealing with my own parental failing here momentarily as well as I made the request, when this brother said to me, remember the thief on the cross. When he said this it was as if a God showed me that this was to be a lesson in Grace for my young child. He understood who Christ was and believed. When I walked in, my child being ever so cunning had said that she was tired, and went to bed at 5:30. I kindly asked my wife to retrieve her from the bed and come visit with me before punishment.
She came and sat on a the little foot stool in front of me. I prayed and fumbled some of my words, as I hoped to give her a picture of God’s Grace and yet continue with a punishment. After establishing her responsibility in her actions, I attempted to explain to her in smaller terms that the thief on the cross was still punished for what he did in this life which was to steal. The consequences of sin in this life still carry with them often their full effect, but we discussed that the sin was against not only parents, principal, and school but her heavenly father. She seemed to understand and to grasp this concept. Yes she has professed to believe for a little time now. I told her that she needed to be truly sorry in her heart, difficult to explain contrition at this point but I did my best. She said to me that she was, and then I said then “God forgives you and so do I !” and it was like a stream of tears came rushing down relieving all of the pressure and anxiety built up from the wait of her punishment, and the guilt of her offense. As we talked of how the thief on the cross was forgiven, and went to be with Jesus that day she curled up in my arms and sobbed ever so gently, eventually fading away.
She received a spanking, and it pained me so to carry it out, but just as the thief paid with his earthly life for what he had done, so it was that my child in this instance paid the penalty with a couple of swift memorable swats. However I pray that she walked away with an understanding to a greater degree God’s grace and forgiveness, and ultimately His love as well as mine.
I’m still taking it to some degree as my lack in parenting, but understanding God’s sovereignty in training daughter and I as we go through this life with one another. I pray also that I was not too harsh that God would fill all of my inequities and lackings in parenting. It is always a risky thing to be transparent, I pray this may be beneficial to at least someone. I will say this that it demonstrates a living bible, and active word, when we have these opportunities of grace. I thank God for His Grace.
One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”
Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
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